I'm not really myself right now. I'm not really even my depressed self right now. No, I'm more of an empty husk of the person I should be. All I am is a void, a barren wasteland of nothingness. I feel nothing (well, I guess that isn't entirely true - I can feel anger. But that's about all). I'm devoid of everything that makes me me. And I don't know where the fuck it went.
I'm not even sure I'm alive. I'm not even sure if I care if I'm alive. What does it really matter? I'm empty and flat and nothing and I can't even cry because I feel no emotion!
I'm trying. I went to the gym this morning and cleaned the house and talked with my mom on the phone . . . I might as well have been staring at the wall. That's what it all feels like. Nothing.
Fuck.
Everyone keeps asking if everything's okay,
The truth is that it's not,
But I don't know what to say . . .
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