You read the title right! Saturday, April 3rd, I was baptized. Not only was I baptized, I was also confirmed, and had first communion. It's kind of a big deal.
Let's back up a minute though. Since September I've been doing RCIA classes at our church, learning about Catholicism and what it means to become a Catholic. Class is every Tuesday night from 6:30-8:30pm. Through May. That's a lot of classes! And a lot of learning! It's been soooo interesting going to these classes. At first I wasn't excited about it. Hubby asked if I would go to a class on Catholicism and I went, thinking it was just one class. Boy was I wrong! The first few weeks I didn't know what to think. I was skeptical and, honestly, overwhelmed. But the more I went, the more I enjoyed it. The more I learned, the more I could see myself becoming Catholic. It wasn't an easy decision - far from it. Because there are still some things about the Catholic faith that I haven't reconciled with (like birth control). But I felt it fit me. The deep seated traditions and rituals, which at first I found stuffy and rigid, became a comfort to me. I found myself actually enjoying mass (hubby and I had tried several different churches over the years and none of them felt right - they were all too . . . hippy dippy. But Catholic mass makes me feel calm and connected).
So I've been doing these classes, went on a day long "retreat", and had been preparing for my baptism (I was never baptized as an infant or child). I was a little nervous, mostly excited. I didn't know what to expect - how I would feel, how exactly it would go . . . but I wasn't nearly as nervous as I thought I would be. The baptism happened at the Saturday Easter vigil mass (which is from 9pm to midnight - I'm usually in bed at 9pm!). I was to wear black to start and bring a change of clothes with me to change into after the baptism (which were white).
Mass started out dark. The lights were out. Everyone had a candle and at the start of mass we all went outside to a bon fire and had our candles lit. We then proceeded back into the church, candle light lighting the way. It was beautiful. Hundreds of candles burning. There were 6 readings (regular mass has two), lots of singing, and then the homily. After the homily, Father Baron called those of us who were being baptized to come to the front (it was me, two children, and a teenager). We were paraded around the church with our sponsors and let back to the baptismal pool. I went third. I watched as the kids had holy water poured over their heads, wondering how I would feel. When it was my turn I stepped carefully into the pool (I was wearing a long skirt - I didn't want to trip!). Fr Baron poured water over me three times - in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Y'all, it took my breath away. Not in an oh-my-goodness-I'm-getting-water-poured-over-me-and-I-can't-breathe sort of way, but in an oh-my-goodness-I-can't-believe-this-is-happening-and-I-feel-so-amazing sort of way. It was amazing. It was shocking. I felt so joyful and so full. Just . . . full. Filled with joy and happiness and amazement that this was actually happening to me. I was being baptized! Jesus loves me! I was awestruck. I don't think my face showed my true feelings. Hubby took some pics (which are very unflattering, btw), and they don't show how I was feeling inside. I wanted to laugh and yell and proclaim my joy, but I didn't. I honestly didn't want people to think I was crazy or something. But that's how I felt.
After we were all baptized, we headed up to the front of the church, wrapped in towels, to be confirmed. Fr Baron marked our foreheads with the sign of the cross with oil, announcing our chosen saint's name (mine was Dymphna, the patron saint of mental health). We then were dismissed to go and change our clothes. As I was walking back to the changing room I don't think I've ever felt so present. I dried my hair and face a bit (I was drenched), careful not to remove the oil from my forehead. I changed into a white blouse and skirt and made my way back to my pew. The four of us who were baptized were then invited back up to take first communion. The body and blood of Christ. In regular mass, you only consume the body of Christ (a very thin cracker) because of covid. But for us who were baptized, we were also given the option to drink the blood of Christ (wine). I chose to do both. My first time taking communion was a little surreal. When I sat back down I felt so calm and content and full.
All in all, it was pretty darn amazing and awesome and wonderful. A memorable experience. I feel blessed.
(On a side note, I didn't explain any of this to hubby - it feels weird talking like this, opening up about what I experienced. Because I've never been religiously open before. I'm sure I'll get there. So for now, he'll just have to read this post.)
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